Dark Eye Visitor

Yesterday was a beautiful sunny fall day. Not much pedestrian activity in the village, traffic was slow. While I was completing some paperwork at the cash counter, in walked a visitor that has not been in my store previously, not that I knew of anyway, but I have seen him around the village. Perhaps the visitor has come in while Jenny was working on a Saturday, but I doubt it, she would have mentioned the visit. Generally when I see him in the village he is in a hurry, stopping once or twice on the sidewalk turning to look to see who is following, then continues on his way.


He startled me because he came in quietly, the door to the store was open so the bells on the door handle did not jingle giving me warning that a visitor was coming in. My stomach did a little jump, and I stood frozen just looking at him for a few seconds. My mind was saying Oh crap! I'm in trouble. Just what I don't need. How am I going to get him to leave.


I didn't have any sort of weapon to defend myself in case he attacked me. Nothing to throw except a water bottle. But what if it hit him and hurt him. I would feel terrible. It wasn't like he was attacking me, he just startled me and stood looking at me. His eyes were creepy though they were so dark. Finally my brain started working again and I stomped my foot and yelled Shoo!

The squirrel turned around and scampered out the door and down the sidewalk, taking the nut he had in his mouth with him. I let out a sigh of relief and continued working.

Sammy the Redhead & Belly the Cavalier

Sammy has to go back to the vet. The doctor called today, on a Sunday, to let us know that Sammy's liver something or other is 10x's what it should be. The phenobarbital levels are good, but something is wrong with his liver. The vet said we should have an ultra sound done asap to determine if Sammy has gall bladder issues and something else I can not spell or pronounce.

UUgghhh!. I noticed the redhead wasn't acting right the last few weeks. But nothing really specific. He was sleeping more giving me the squnity eye, and hiding under my desk more. I thought it was just the weather change. Good thing I took him in for his blood test last week.

I have not been able to schedule an appointment with the Cardiologist Vet for Belevedere. The cardiologist only works certain days and is booked solid. I am going to ask our regular vet for a different cardiologist name, hopefully there is another one.

I love my dogs.

All the dogs are getting the hang of the doggie door. Well at least most of them go out the door, coming back in is another matter.

Cowboys steal last-second win over Bills

Again they lost in the last few seconds of the game. I want a refund for the season tickets we have. The Bills suck worse this year then they did last year.

Thankfully I do not go to the games. I stopped going after I discovered that the season ticket guy next to us chewed tobacco and liked to spit it on the ground in front of his seat. The ground is cement which allows the tobacco spit to splatter and spread. By the end of the game the person sitting next to the chew guy can pretty much be guaranteed to have spit all over her shoes and pant legs. Asking security or the front office to do something about Mr Tobacco Chewer doesn't work. So I stopped going.

G Man went with 15 of his customers last night and did not get home until 4AM. He had fun. How could he not. 16 men in a limo, with 6 cases of beer, tons of delicious tailgate food, at a pro football game with more beer available at the stadium and no wives around. It didn't matter if the Bills won or lost ( a win would have been nice, but not necessary) to G Man, he went for the camaraderie. This is the 6th or 7th year that he has gone with the guys he went with last night. Obviously they all enjoy it or else they would not go.

So I say ever year, Go! Play! GoodBYE! Have fun! In moderation of coarse.

And every year the Bills suck, and lose the game that G Man and the guys go to see. Maybe next year will be different. Ha!!

Dog Training and kids

G Man is trying to get the dogs to use a doggie door. So far Jack the chocolate lab gets the idea.The other dogs need to see a crack in the door before they will push through. It's been two weeks and they are improving, but it is taking longer then G Man would like.


My son confided he is having a hard time making rent and keeping up with school. He takes 18 credit hours and works 25-30 hours a week delivering pizza. The real estate job is extremely slow,mostly because he does not have time to devote to it. I am kind of secretly pleased that Greg is struggling. He needed a dose of real life and is living it now. Money is tight, he has to work to pay the bills and is not able to buy frivolous items. He said he appreciates his dad's hard work and the contributions I made to his life. I hugged him when he told me.


But what is it with fathers and daughters. Jenny goes to school, works as a nanny and helps with the store. Nothing to strenuous. She lives at home and comes and goes as she pleases. Pays her own cell phone bill, pays for her entertainment, clothes, school books, gas for the car and car repairs. G Man lectures about budgeting, saving money, the future etc. Tells me I am not to spend anymore money on the kids then turns around and buys our daughter Ugg shoes. Because she wanted them. $110.00 shoes!!!!!!

When I asked G Man about the shoes, he just grinned and said " I'm her dad" UUggghh!!! Uh ok spoiling the princess again is more like it. Secretly I am glad he can do that.

Not much else is going on. Life is bland and slow now. Thankfully.

Breast Cancer Awareness

This morning, thanks in part to my selfish sister, I had a mammogram. Every thing is Ok. I do not have to go back for a year.

Because my mother's sister had breast cancer when she was 65ish, and my sister, who will be 50 in December has it, I have to be extra vigilant with the self breast examines. G Man has volunteered to help with that also, imagine, a guy offering to help a woman examine her breasts. Hummm funny how that happens. But anyway, I have to make sure I do them routinely and have a mammogram annually.

The last mammogram was nearly 7 years ago. Time flies. I did not really believe it was that long ago, but that is what the medical records indicate. I will keep my promise to G Man and my daughter and have an annual mammogram.

I encourage all women to get a mammogram. Check with your doctor regarding frequency of the a mammogram and follow through with the procedure. It doesn't hurt, it's not embarrassing, and it could save your life.

Plus at the imaging center I went to this morning all the really good magazines were available to read. I got some great recipes, looked at the latest Dog Fancy, and will now go buy the Martha Stewart Living Fall edition, she had some cute ideas for Halloween. And they let me drink my Starbucks in the waiting room. What more can a girl ask for?

sister II

My mother called me at the store today. She started the conversation with " I know you said you did not want to know about your sister good or bad, but you need to know." " She has a rare form of cancer, very invasive, and has to have a double mastectomy." Then she cried and said "I wrote her a letter asking her to let me at least give moral support."


I sighed, a mutilated chest popped up in my brain, and a conversation I had with my sister years ago also popped into my head. I told my mom she had to act according to her heart and asked her to find out the name of the cancer so I could call my doctor and learn what I have to do for my daughter and myself.


My sister is still refusing to allow my mom to contact her. My sister just wants my mom to know she is sick. A continuation of selfish vindictiveness on the part of my sister.

How is it that siblings can be so different? How can a daughter be this cruel to her mother? I pray it is a mental illness and not evil in her heart. A mental illness is easier to accept and understand than just plain evilness.

G Man

NYC was good. G Man suggested we drive, I suggested a train about an hour outside the city because neither of us would be able to navigate Manhattan. We spent the night in Poughkeepsie, had a nice dinner and caught the train to Grand Central Station. The train ride was new experience for the both of us.


As it turned out the train ride was fun and a little romantic. We were able to talk uninterrupted, and G man even held my hand. ( that is the romantic part) To be honest I was surprised. G Man is not one for public displays of affection, but recently he has been holding my hand and putting his arm around me, with out giving me a nookie, in public.


Maybe I have had the time to notice. Not having kids around (they are in college) allows me free time, and no distractions. I can focus on the G man.

He even bought me a rose from a little boy, without prodding or complaining, when we were in Little Italy. We have been together so long that taking each other for granted ( is that the correct saying) unfortunately comes naturally.


I enjoyed holding G Man's hand and feeling the callous roughness and strength of it. So I have decided to notice the small things, the positive and good that make up the big picture of our relationship.This trip, even though is was for business, was a nice way to rekindle the friendship and a little bit of romance.

Dysfunction continues

My brother David called my house while I was in NYC and left a message with my daughter Jenny. She called me as soon as she hung up with David. The message brought sadness, but not guilt or a need to examine decisions made by me a year ago.


The message concerned my 49 year old sister, who has not spoken to me, our mom or our youngest brother Matt since our father died 4 years ago. She did not speak to Matt or me for a few years prior to our dad's death either. Her reasons are many, varied and most are figments of her imagination. She believes she is the victim of everything and events are purposely done to her to make her life miserable. She has a daughter that she does not have a relationship with, has divorced her ex-husband twice, has affairs, is mean, full of anger, and spiteful. Recently her boyfriend of 5 years told her to pack up and get out. My sister has been on her own for 3 months and all ready has a new boyfriend, he is 12 years younger then she.

Part of the message was my mom and I are not to know where my sister is living or her telephone number. She wants no contact with us. I have worked out all the emotions of sadness, guilt, and the need to to help my sister. She has chosen the paths of loneliness, isolation from most of her family, and the continuation of dysfunction inherited from our father and the generations of his family before him.

Counseling and G Man helped me understand the whys of my family's problems and how to let go of them. I have been happy and have a life filled with happiness and good people for years now. Perfection will never be attained and is not realistic, but the pursuit of goodness, happiness and giving back positively to the community are the paths I have chosen.

My sister is alone. She has no one who loves her in her life. Her vindictiveness, jealousy, and meanness have taken over her life. Reconciliation is not possible. I hoped and tried for along time to have a relationship with my sister. She is my big sister, the only sister I have, someone that should be my best friend, someone I should be calling every day to kibbutz with, go shopping with, make plans with, but that fairy tale relationship never happened and will never be.

My sister has breast cancer.

I'm still here

I am soooooooo busy. I can not believe it. I decided not to install the Internet in my store. The cost is ridiculous and the village should have free wi-fi up and running soon, hopefully, maybe, who knows, but I continue to be optimistic. Anyway, I am here, I read all the blogs when I have a chance, if time allows for comments I will leave them, mostly time is not on my side. (where does Johnny Yen get the energy and time to write?)

So some quick updates, Belevedere the cavalier has a heart murmur and needs to be seen by a cardiologist. The murmur is common in cavaliers. He may have to be on medication, we shall find out when I take him to the cardiologist.

G Man and I are going to NYC next week for a fashion show. G Man does not want to fly so we are driving. His reason for not flying is it take the same amount of time to drive then fly, and he has better control over departure. I agree, but it is turning into a major pain in the butt. We have to find some place to catch a train outside the city because I do not want him or me to drive in Manhattan. We are looking forward to eating in Little Italy and getting some Rays pizza. I want to get bialys from Kossars but will most likely not have time to get to Brooklyn. Oh the suffering I must endure.

My mom has scheduled her hip replacement surgery, dismissing my disapproval and that of my brothers. She is still overweight and smoking, oh well whats a couple more risk factors when one enjoys the perceived attention one gets from medical problems. Mom has also allowed my niece to use her car, convinced the niece no longer has a drug problem. Mom said she can tell the niece is no longer doing drugs. Okay, reality is what is perceived I guess. Just stick your head in the sand and everything is all right. Put on the rose colored glasses to see what you want to see.

So the positive is, son, G Man, son's girlfriend and I are going to see Artie Lang at a comedy club, mid November, I think the date is mid November. The Bills only lost by 1 point at the opening home game . I have been working out 4-5 days a week at 7 am and attending yoga once a week, and meeting with the personal trainer once a week. I haven't lost any weight but I feel better. The fogginess has cleared from my head. I found a fabulous magazine with lots of good recipes in it for fall cooking. Green beans and pancetta with a honey and sherry sauce, slow roasted tomatoes with garlic, Apple, sausage and potato casserole and many more. I also was able to get my hands on the recipes from a well known soup store in town and made one of the soups this afternoon. Delicious!

SO I have to go back to work , data entry, bill paying, filing etc. Have a fun weekend everyone! Miss you guys.

Picture taking

Yesterday I went to two produce stands that offered fabulous veggies and fruit. The first stand is owned by a small organic farmer. She grows veggies and wild flowers. The corn, peppers, and peaches were so delicious I am going back for more today. I used the peppers in a bruschetta mixed with kalmata olives, garlic, 4 other kinds of peppers, mushrooms, flat parsley, and olive oil. Yum.
On the way to the organic produce stand we drove past a Mennonite farm. Today I am bringing my camera and will take some pictures of the Mennonite barn and view of the lake. The view is spectacular. Pictures of the organic produce stand will be very pretty if I can get the wild flowers in the pictures.

Then I will go to the second produce stand which is a Mennonite stand. He had melons that were so juicy and sweet I have to get more. The Mennonite gentleman was not very talkative and really dirty. His daughter that was helping him was about 6 years old and filthy. She would not talk to me at all. I'm not sure if they will let me take their picture but I will try.

Last night was the ring of fire around the lake. All the property owners build bond fires and light flares. It was very pretty. I did not have film in the camera that is good for night time pictures so I did not take pictures. Maybe I can find some online and post them later. The event is really something to see.

A little bit of history regarding the ring of fire:
Bare Hill rises 865 feet above Canandaigua Lake and provides awe-inspiring views of the lake and valley. It also lives up to its name. The Department of Environmental Conservation (DEC) mows around the trees on the summit, keeping this hilltop bare.
You will walk land where the Genundowa Festival of Lights originated. Genundowa was the name of a Seneca village near Bare Hill. Each year in early September, the Seneca Elders and the tribes Keepers would light a large fire on top of Bare Hill as part of the Seneca Autumn Ceremony of Thanksgiving for a successful harvest. This fire was followed by smaller fires along the lake, resulting in a ring of light as a gesture of Indian unity.
Seneca history is hidden in legend. One legend says that the first Seneca settlement occurred in Naples Valley around 1400. Other legends assert that they came from the Adirondack area or from Montreal, either following game or to escape warring tribes. In either case, by the 1600s the Seneca Nation numbered over 10,000.
Seneca folklore has an explanation for the tree-less nature of Bare Hill. Legend says that while out canoeing one day, a Seneca youth found a brightly colored snake which he adopted as his pet. The boy fed the serpent insects, frogs and small mammals. As the serpent grew, bigger animals were supplied. Over time, it became so large that the boy, now a warrior and skilled hunter, had to request the assistance of the village in obtaining sufficient food. The small, beautiful snake had become a ravenous monster.
The villagers began to fear the serpent when food supplies dwindled, and they planned to escape to a new fortified village on a hill to the north. The monster serpent appeared, coiled its great body around the village and swallowed all but two children, a brother and sister who did not follow the villagers in their attempt to escape.
In a dream, a spirit instructed the boy to kill the snake by shooting an arrow in a scale behind its eye. The boy’s shot was successful, but death did not come immediately. The serpent’s mammoth body writhed and twisted, its long tail viciously lashed the hillside, smashing trees and bushes until the hillside was swept clean. As the serpent plunged down the hill, the heads of its human victims were disgorged. Finally the great serpent fell into the lake. Today, round stones found in the area are known to geologists as septaria and to local residents as Indian heads.
Around 1570, five Seneca tribes united into the League of Five Nations, later called the Iroquois Confederacy. Historians call this early government the “greatest achievement of Stone Age man” because of its extensive code of laws. Council Rock at the summit of Bare Hill was the traditional site of the Seneca Indian council fires