Yesterday, twice, I found myself looking at severely obese people wondering how much of my health insurance costs were because of people like them. Asking myself how much welfare money was going towards their health care, and wondering why they were as fat as they are.
Normally I am a very caring person, but for some reason I was really angry at those obese people. I am disgusted and ashamed of myself. What has gotten into my brain that would cause me to view people as dollar signs?
Perhaps some of the anger is from me being disgusted with my mom. She is severely over weight and does nothing about it. She is smoking again and lying about it. Mother's Day was a disaster. She ended up alone, crying, and hanging up on me, my daughter, and my sister in law. Only to call the next day apologizing and to tell me she is going to see her counselor to find out why she has these angry outburst. I can tell you why. For attention. She has nothing wrong with her physically except her obesity, so now she has moved on to "mental" health. UUUgghhhh!
I will silently apologize to the obese people I viewed with disdain yesterday, and put good karma out in the universe. My mom is another story. I am not sure what to do with her.
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8 years ago
8 comments:
Honestly, I used to be pissed off at them Cheer when they used up all the handicapped parking. But I realized that I can't see them that way and expect people not to see Skyler in the same light.
Mr. Ex was negative towards obese people. Very much so. I tried to explain to him that not everyone has his metabolism. Not everyone's brain is wired the same way... I had no influence whatsoever.
I guess I try very, very hard to not judge because my maternal grandmother had severe diabetes in times when the treatments were crude. The genes were passed to two out of her four children, my mom being a lucky one. Grandma died unable to hear or see. Her youngest child (the only one still living) just had a leg amputated as a result of lifelong diabetes. None of these people had the kind of education or opportunities for treatment that are available today. The chemistry in her body did not process food properly, they were poor and their diet was primarily carbohydrates! OMG, imagine! They were obese most of their lives. They were also good, hard working, honest people. Their lives were very difficult. Health care? No such thing. Welfare? My grandparents would starve first. They left this world leaving a small amount to each of their four kids, never bought anything they couldn't pay for... I'm proud to be part of their legacy. Obesity or not.
When Thing 3 said something the other day like, "Ew, a fat person.", I gave him a similar spew about my grandparents - you are in great company!! :-)
p.s., sadly, other than my mom, the other kid that didn't get diabetes died at age 32 from a metabolic disorder. Some genes really can cause some problems, huh? My mom was the luckies one.
SD and Bubbles: I feel horrible about the thoughts I had...I am not like that usually...I really think it has to do with my mom ....I am so angry with her for not participating in life
It could be that your mom really does need mental help and the obesity is a side effect. I hope she feels better soon.
The sad fact is that there is actual talk about how smoking and obesity will factor into saving social security. Seriously.
GKL: Thanks for the well wishes for my mom...her entire life has focused on someone who is sick, has been ill,or dying. Her father, mother, my dad, friend's husbands. That is all she knows, I guess. When I was a child, my mom was always sick with something, that is what I remember most about her and my childhood. BUT she purposely caused her illness or pretending the illness was worse then it actully was. Same thing going on now. I try to be tolerant but it is difficult. Perhaps my own selfishness of wanting a mom that would participate in life, be a part of my life in a positive way, is just selfish on my part and something my mom is not capable of doing. This behavior of hers is very frustrating.
Johnny: I know you are correct.
Cheer
I'm so sorry about your mom. I have a very, very good friend that has a mom that needs to have everything be about her. It has been so tough on my friend her whole life, even as an adult. My ex-mil is focused completely on herself, also. She raised 6 kids that always ask, "What's in it for me?" first.
Kudos to you (and that good friend of mine for not being self involved like your moms!
Accepting our parents AS-IS is pretty tough stuff. I struggled with it for a long time myself, even though my mom was my very best friend in the world by the end.
Connected souls... fascinating stuff, huh?
I understand the frustration. It does seem like something more is going on. I just hope it comes to a resolution soon!
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